REGRETS: WHY LOVE SHOULD BE FOUNDATION OF EVERY RELATIONSHIP.
So Friday was a terrible day for me because it started like any other day, but then it quickly took a turn for the worse. So as I opened Discord, I was bombarded with a series of messages from my kid's father. See I've learned to ignore him, after series of threats and yes this took time, see he took it a step further this time around as he showed up at my parents doorstep where I currently reside, he demanded that I hand over our marriage certificate, which isn't even possible for me to hand over.
He had claimed that I had stolen it from him when I had moved my things ,but this was a blatant lie. So I refused to give it to him, and that's when things escalated. The conversation turned into a heated argument,my mom couldn't do anything because she has a weak knee, and my dad was out for a function, and before I knew it, things got out of hand. He became violent, and I ended up with a broken tooth and a bleeding arm.
Now as I sit here,just trying to process everything that has happened, I am just reminded of an important lesson that marriage should be built on love, not obligation. See what I mean here,when we settle for someone out of obligation, rather than genuine love and connection, it can lead to disastrous consequences like big consequences.
And yes my story is a testament to this. I married someone because I felt obligated to,I felt that him being my listening ear then was an avenue to go ahead to be with him, and now look where it got me. A broken tooth, an injured arm, a broken heart, and a lifetime of regret.
So I say this to all the singles out there, please hear me out. Do not ever get married to someone because you feel it is the right thing to do. Marry someone because you love them with every fiber of your being. Marry someone because you can not imagine spending the rest of your life without them
See I know it is not always easy. We have all been in situations where we feel like we owe someone something. But trust me, marriage is not the answer. Marriage should be a union of two people who love and cherish each other, not a way to repay a debt. Never…….
Well ,as I go through this difficult time, I am just reminded of the importance of self love and self care. I am learning to prioritize my own needs and well-being, rather than trying to please someone else.
If you're going through a similar situation, please know that you are not alone. There are people who care about you and want to help. Also do not be afraid to reach out for support, whether it is a friend, family member, or professional counselor, cause right now that is what is helping me.
Also , to those who may be thinking of marrying someone out of obligation, I say to you to reconsider. Just take a step back and evaluate your feelings ,like check yourself out really well. Ask yourself if you are truly in love with this person, or if you are only just trying to please someone else.
So remember, marriage is a lifetime commitment. It is not something to be taken lightly. Make sure you are making a decision that is right for you, not just someone else.
I will still say I'm grateful for this experience, even though it is painful as it is. It has still taught me a valuable lesson about the importance of love and self-care in marriage. And I hope that by me sharing this, I can help others avoid making the same mistakes I did.
Yeah so remember to always prioritize your own happiness and well-being.
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love, relationship, and marriage are complicated, if you choose to go for someone that you love, what if the person doesn't love you the same way? moreover, love fades with time, commitment is what keeps it going...
As for your husband, why does he need the marriage certificate and why are you holding unto it, is there something important attached to having it in ones possession?
I have always been with the certificate, I need it in case my school needs it for my clearance, cos I submitted it Wen I registered school.
As for relationship and all that, yeah I guess you maybe be right about the commitment part, but Wen there is no ounce of commitment then all is just pressure.
Well I'm staying off whatever, because it's not for me
See ,my man ,all what she is saying are lies ,she can be so manipulative but I know some day ,truth will always come out if all that she saying is truth . please don't always believe what women say when things dont work out for them in marriage.
She doesn't listen to me ,she doesn't have respect,she doesn't like taking responsibility,she believes man can not control her,and some other bad characters,all because she started making some money to herself ,
I am a very calm person but she turned me to something else all because I truly loved her,but I believe their is God .
Bolaji it is well ,I just have to say this here because she is lying ,she really abused my life but I leave everything to God @burlaj
sorry man, I don't interfere in couples affair, hopefully you guys get to settle it someday
Specially in marriage, I say. Like you said, if it's just for obligation and to meet societal norms, then happiness would be hard to find. But sometimes, we have to prioritize other obligations when love fades away. And I believe that's okay, too, as long we have a respectful relationship.
May we all find love.
Good luck in yours
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So sorry about this dear
Don't worry girl, you are beautiful and will still attract your own love. Just calm down and take care of yourself 💗.