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◈ The Ink Well

Too Late for an Apology (CF)

At such a pace, I didn't believe that I was doomed to fail.

My close friends advised me to make a U-turn in my career.

Yes, Bola, my own husband, whose words of advice once looked like callous reprimands designed to bring about my downfall.

If not that I am a woman of peace,

Every single day, I moved at my own pace to become a better person. But anytime I remembered the preposterous comment he made about my attire at the dinner night during one of the quintessential occasions held in Ikoyi, Lagos, among some of the well-to-do families, I felt bitter—not to mention how he told me that I was dull at my own birthday party.

Bola was not a bad person. In fact, he had been my motivation in every area. When I detested teaching little kids, he found a teaching job for me. He would say, "I can't allow you to stay at home as a full-time housewife."

He would often ask, "What is a woman with a Second Class degree in Business Administration doing in my kitchen?"

"Gone are the days when a lady like you would be meant for house chores only," Bola would say.

On the days when I was agitated, nervous, or tired, Bola was always in the kitchen. He always placated or pacified the tension between my mum and me.

In fact, the current Access Bank job that I was doing was a result of my husband's motivation. It is not a fallacy but the whole truth.

My own sister, Oluwasodunke, told me never to be alone and to take matters easy when the first quarrel happened between my husband and me.

It was over the fact that I hardly cooked or made time for the family. He also blamed it on the fact that I felt that I now had a new job that paid three times more than his and that I could gallantly pay all the bills.

However, I know that such a situation wasn't caused by a single overnight challenge. We had been married for five years without children. As my mother-in-law would always say, "No issue."

Oh! He used to love me, and I know he still loves me, but who am I to blame?

On the 1st of October, 2018, we went to see a family doctor because of this same issue. However, because it was a home—or let me say an informal—setting, he advised us to go for some tests.

After we did the tests, we found out that he had a low sperm count. Instead of admitting that he was the one with the problem, he began to throw the blame on me.

Now, to cap it all, his family, especially his mother, would often come over to tell me that I was proud because I earned much more than her son.

There was a day I went for one of her children's parties. She kept sending me on errands when there were younger people in the family whom she could have asked instead.

Okay, I even went into the room where my husband was to shield myself from the unnecessary stress. Then my in-laws came to tell me that there were plates to wash. As in...

I had to tell them to ask Sister Toyin, the youngest in the house.

That one too...

Hmm! I didn't know that statement would stir up Toyin's shenanigans.

Toyin came in full fury, charging at me.

"Why would I, a law graduate of the prestigious University of Abuja, do the dishes for some illiterates?"

I replied, "Who are you referring to as an illiterate? Your siblings or me?"

She answered, "The intruder knows herself."

I noticed that my husband, Bola, stood there powerless, watching his siblings hurl abusive words at me. I was shocked. I was heartbroken, and ever since then, I distanced myself from his family.

The divorce letter was on the table one Saturday evening. He told me that his family had held a meeting and that the Olori Ebi (family head) had agreed that I should be given a divorce letter.

I was shocked.

I said to him, "Divorce letter? You know that you are the one with the problem."

Bola's eyes were red as though he had cried, but he still chose to make the decision.

Finally, I used one of the links he had sent me to travel to the UK.

And here I am, enjoying life.

One day, I received a call from the doctor saying that my ex-husband left me because he couldn't cope with the fact that he couldn't impregnate anyone.

He added that there were options like IVF and many others through which we could have had children.

He also said that my ex-husband still loves me and is willing to apologise, but he doesn't want to reopen old wounds.

Right now, I have forgiven him, but I can't go back to my vomit.

Never!!


Image was created using chat gtp AI.



Thans @theinkwell, eceny and hive.

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This was a powerful read. I agree that an apology carries more weight when it comes with accountability and timely action. Sometimes the damage done cannot be completely undone, but sincere remorse and personal growth can still make a difference

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Yes! That is true. Accurate timing is needed. Thanks for the response.

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Thanks for posting using Ecency!

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