瞥见年少的冲动与迷茫 A Glimpse of Youth's Impulse and Confusion 【中文/English】

周五晚高峰的公交站，意外撞见一辆崭新的双层公交，在市区里都少见，却在行政级别为街道的这里看到了，有点意外。公交车上几个背着书包的学生挤在走道里，叽叽喳喳聊个不停，听语气和讨论的状态，更偏向初中生。她们凑在一起吐槽同桌、议论老师，闲扯八卦
，还兴致勃勃地聊起同学打架的事，甚至提到有人录了视频，言语间完全没有背后议论别人说悄悄话控制音量的意识

这一幕瞬间把我拉回学生时代，那些遥远的记忆突然清晰起来。上学时也偶有听闻“年级老大”“群殴”“被派出所拘留”之类的传闻，虽未亲眼所见，却也并不陌生。没想到如今的学生群体中，依旧有类似的冲突发生，还会被身边同学这样津津乐道地讨论。

和我们当年不同，现在的孩子人手一部智能手机，围观打架并录视频的行为，不仅让冲动的瞬间留下永久痕迹，更可能无意间将他人的痛苦转化为猎奇素材，助推暴力行为的传播。忽然想起小学老师说过，他年少时也是众人眼中的“玩闹儿”，直到工作后才发觉过去的种种毫无意义。那个时候或许有些人觉得“逞凶斗狠”“当老大”很帅，多半是受了当年古惑仔影视的影响；而如今的孩子，又在被什么左右呢？

不知道多年后，当这些孩子步入社会、回望年少，会如何看待这份冲动与围观？时光不语，却总能在回望时，让我们看清成长的模样，也读懂那些年少轻狂背后的迷茫与懵懂。

At the bus stop during Friday's evening rush, I suddenly spotted a brand-new double-decker bus. These buses are rare even in downtown areas, so it was a surprise to find one here—a sub-district. On the bus, several students with schoolbags squeezed in the aisle, chatting loudly nonstop. From their voices and the way they talked, they were probably junior high school students. They huddled together to complain about their deskmates, gossip about teachers, chat about trivial rumors, and even excitedly talked about a fight between classmates. They mentioned someone had recorded the fight, and didn't seem to realize they should lower their voices when gossiping about others.
This scene immediately took me back to my school days, and those distant memories suddenly became clear again. Back then, I also heard rumors from time to time, such as "grade tough guy," "group fight," or "being taken to the police station." I never saw these things myself, but they sounded familiar. I didn't expect similar conflicts still happen among students today, and that their classmates would talk about them so excitedly.
Unlike when we were young, almost every child today has a smartphone. Watching a fight and recording it not only leaves a permanent mark of that impulsive moment, but may also accidentally turn others' pain into a spectacle, making violent behavior spread more easily. I suddenly remembered what my primary school teacher once said: he was also called a "troublemaker" when he was young. It was not until he started working as a teacher that he realized all those past things were meaningless. Back then, some people thought being tough and "being the boss" was cool—mostly influenced by the gangster movies of that era. But what is influencing today's children?
I wonder how these children will feel about this impulse and their onlooker behavior when they grow up, enter society, and look back on their youth? Time doesn't speak, but when we look back, it always helps us see what growth truly is, and understand the confusion and innocence behind that youthful recklessness.

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