Crazy Naija Expectation For 21st Century Adult.
It is normal for us to set expectations for ourselves because we want to improve our lives and achieve some things or achievement at a certain age, but currently in Nigeria, there are some unrealistic expectations in which the society has set that make a man or woman think about their life when they see other people achieve it with ease or through fraud.
Our parents indeed got married at an early age. If we are to look back to the previous generation and discuss the age they got married, we would be surprised at the age they all got married. Currently, people who got married in their early 20s are considered the serious ones, while 25 and above are considered marrying late or unserious fellow.
Right now, the expectation of getting married after your university education is a common thing in Nigeria, especially for the ladies. You will hear things like, "You are done with your university, bah? So when are you getting married?" People don't want to know if you have other plans to achieve, but they expect you to bring a man home with your degree. Parents forget they told us not to get into any relationships while we were studying.
Another thing people expect is that, if you are old enough to move out of your parents' house, they expect you to get a place very far from your parents's house. Now, this feels like a taboo to get a resident in the same city as your parents. I know some people don't feel comfortable getting a house in the same city as their parents because people expect them to move far from their parents.
As a man, when you are 30 years old or approaching that age, there are certain things people are meant to see you have, and they are
House
Car
A wife
A job that pays hundreds of thousands.
It is fine to achieve all these things before the age of 30, or at the age of 30, but who are the people setting these rules? You talk to a lady, and the conversation can go like this:
Her: How old are you?
Him: I am 30 years old.
Her: Where is your car?
Him: I don't have a car.
Her: At least you should have a house.
Him: I don't; I live in a rented apartment.
Her: So what have you been doing in your 20s?
This is just the sad reality of the expectations people have now. People expect a guy to have achieved all this at the age of 30, and this has pushed a lot of young boys and girls into fraud and odd jobs just to live up to the expectations of society.
I dislike it when people keep asking me, "When are you getting married?" Like, please mind your business. There are other things to life than getting married before the age of 30. One thing that is funny now is that I see many people my age or younger get married, and it makes it look like I am unserious. Or am I really unserious? Anyway, I have learned not to live my life to people's expectations because if I do, I will make many mistakes on my journey to success.
Thanks for reading. All images used are mine.
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Hahaha 🤣🤣..I was just laughing out loud for myself, especially with the conversation you put up there. There are lots of delulu in our society today... unrealistic expectations around us giving some people unnecessary pressures
Just take your time and plan ur future my brother
Thank you big anuty. For real, it’s not easy. Many just finish his nysc and trying to build something and some people only thought are
“When are you getting married?”
And some ladies aren’t even making it easy for the struggling young men out there. The expectations have been set so high that some people feel they are useless
😪😪
Make I see rice chop and work be my own
🤣🤣
I thought i was the only one experiencing this pressure from families and friends, i get tired that i dont even know what to say again.
Like, they are not even working together to put you at the top of😂😂
It’s wife that all of them want 😂😂
When you marry and things become tight, they would say Everyman with his family
Lol! Don't mind them.
Nigerians value marriage more than anything, especially the ladies. Because if they don't marry early people would give reasons why she's still single.
Fash don't be pressured by your peers, let them marry, your own time will come.
Hehe
I’m not even pressured cause I know the place I’m heading too.
Let them do wedding and I’ll eat rice when my time comes
They will eat mine too
My dad told me recently that my mom already had her 3rd baby at my age. I was just smiling. That age is different from ours so I can't be pressured. It's the way they call to give me update about my juniors getting married.
It was getting to me before but I've grown thick skin. Now, I go home, pack foodstuff in fact collect transport from them. The only thing I know they can't say is stop coming home.
They'll never ask how far with your plans and how to help, na marriage, it's painful but what can we do?
The last time an uncle came around talking around the same thing, I laughed him to scorn oh. I'm sha not going into that institution until I'm ready.
That said, I decided to stay with my business a year ago. I didn't tell them when I resigned, see the feeling of disappointment on their faces. Whenever I talk about money issues, they'll be like, didn't you get sewing projects? Ọmọ...see question.
I envy those who don't have parents pressurizing them oh.
All in all sha @fashtioluwa when are you getting married? I'm craving for party jollof rice 😂😂
I know the feeling jare.
But no rushing
You’re single
I’m single
1+1=1
How about you get the list from popsi and we fix a date so you don’t ask
Fash when are you marrying
The question will be
Fash, when are we marrying 😏😏
😂😂
I wasn't expecting the reply. You caught me off guard.
🤣 🤣
Don't worry, I'll ask him by morning.
He'll be glad to send the list
Hehe
Ok
I’ll be waiting 🤭🤭
😂😂