The courage to open up . LOH -297

Emotional struggling is one of the most difficult when it comes to about opening up to someone. You may be someone we talk everyday and you feel like I do tell you everything about me,don't be surprised to know that my deepest feelings are mostly kept to myself. Did I choose to become this way? No, I didn't, the experiences I had in my life since I was a kid was the one who taught me to keep things to myself. I was still a teenager when my dad lost his job and as the head of the family everything changed for us all. I watched my older sisters struggles with making ends meet, everyone was with one responsibility or another, so I grew up knowing I am my won strength,my battle is for me to fight and my responsibilities is for me to make up with.

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Another reason opening up becomes difficult is disappointment of not taking my feelings seriously, you know one serious issue might be a concerning issue for somewhere else. It will be more disheartening experiencing such, judging me without proper listening and digestion, so instead of experiencing things like this ,I lock up to prevent them .

There have been moments I had to trust one of my friends because I was overwhelmed at some point that I could no longer carry that burden alone,I decided to share it with someone I could trust enough and the one that listens to me carefully and passionately.
Once I notice a sign of you feeling like I'm a burden,I withdraw myself from such person forever,don't misquote me ,not that I won't talk to that person,infact we might not go a day without talking but the real me inside will never voice out, I never want to be a burden to anyone.

As I grow,I have understand everyone needs someone to lean on at some point and I should trust some people in my life that will genuinely be okay to listen and give me a space to help me lift the burden.